Firstly, my professor rocks. He is funny, kind, and willing to work with us. His hair's pretty much gray and starting to go white. He's tall and lanky with that Old Man Beer Belly that refuses to let pants stay waist-high and relegates them to the hips, whether a belt is present or not. He lights up when we're reading a story, pronouncing each word with flourish. He also laughs a lot.

However.

He tucks his shirts into his underwear. When his pants inevitably do their Slide-Down-An-Inch-Or-Two Routine, a glaringly white elastic band becomes visible at his waist and then it's really hard to pay attention to our reading. He mercifully pulls his pants up sometimes, but sometimes he does NOT and just capers around like he is. That's when I bury my head in my textbook.

Because of this, I know he prefers Fruit of the Loom AND Hanes. A diverse man. At least he IS wearing underwear. I can tell you what would be worse - seeing just skin instead of an elastic band. AAAAAH!

Let me say again: He ROCKS despite his Underwear Flauntage. Also, I think he's having surgery soon. Gee, hit a man while he's down, will you (me)?...I feel mean now...

I know when I get old, my chest will get all flat and saggy, but I should be able to keep my pants up. I hope. WAIT maybe by then we'll all be wearing futuristic skintight suits made out of shiny gray fabric. *horror* An old person in a suit like that would be worse than falling-down pants!

I AM STOPPING NOW. OKAY? OKAY.